I saw my future and all I can say is: GO BACK.

New Years Day I woke up with itchy feet. I showed Zach, who declared it was from my disgusting shoes I wear every day (harsh) and sprayed my feet and shoes with some sort of odor eater/bacteria killer spray I didn't know we owned. Later, I went to take a shower and realized my body was covered with a rash. Is that too much information? It was red and splotchy and it looked like I had a sun burn -my sunburns are always splotchy, my body hates the sun- even though there is no way the sun had even touched my skin in the frigid temperatures we've had down south. The rash went away quickly, but my feet stayed bright red.

In my head I was making a list of everything I could be allergic to. Our new sheets? Sparkling Apple Cider we drank to ring in 2010? The Chipotle I ate last night? Still, it didn't seem like a big deal until I woke up the next day. My toes, feet, ankles, hands and wrists were swollen. My joints ached, my feet itched, and I felt like an eighty year old woman. I could only walk with straight legs like a barbie doll and even my fingers were clumsy and sore. It hurt to stand up, walk down the stairs, type, everything.

WebMD wasn't much help. I typed in my symptoms and pulled up Rheumatoid Arthritis, Lupus, a tick bite, not what I wanted to see, and they all seemed highly unlikely. Then I called my mom who offered a more hopeful scenario. "When I was your age I had fifths disease. It sounds like that" she told me. I called my sister-in-law who is a doctor and described my symptoms. Without me suggesting it, she said fifths disease. She's a smart one.

Fortunately, fifths disease is a common viral infection with temporary side effects and the presence of a rash means I am no longer contagious (woo hoo). Any friends I have seen for the last few days can breathe a sigh of releif. A trip to the doctor today confirmed what I suspected, and I am happy to report my symptoms are a lot milder than they were this weekend. It was a relief to find out this was just a temporary problem, and humbling to start the new year off feeling weak and useless just when everyone is getting ready to accomplish amazing things with their new years' resolutions. As usual, it took a crappy illness to make me feel grateful for my health. I am lucky to have a body that works as well as it does. Thanks to all my friends who offered sympathy and support this weekend.